Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
