I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
