I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
