we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
