The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
