I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Randomize
