Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
