you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
