handjob tips. give me some.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize