Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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