i don't plan on having that self control this summer
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize