It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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