I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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