when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
