I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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