We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I FOUND THE LEGS
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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