She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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