Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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