I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I could make wine with my vomit
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
