My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
