so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Randomize
