You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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