when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
