I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize