This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Randomize
