i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
