And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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