i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Say something about gay babies.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
