So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize