I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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