if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
