threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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