I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
