at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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