2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
