I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
