my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
