so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
MIDGETS
????
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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