Just mADE A PArabola og urine
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
