I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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