I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize
