I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
