Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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