I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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