I'm really into asian looking animals
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
operation have a gay friend backfired
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
