Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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