The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
