I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
