we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
dude. I can hear the air.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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