maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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